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There is no greater lesson in appreciating the TIGHTNESS around you at all times than carrying your camera around with you, everywhere you go, at all times. In this lighthearted Tightness of the Day post, enjoy a multitude of tightness captured by the digicams of El Jefe Helluv and friends.
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When we last left our 1920's Superstars Re-emerged in San Francisco in 2009, they were feeling a bit hyphy after Irish Coffees at Buena Vista, and Stanley finally convinced Ollie to take the plunge into San Francisco's favorite notoriously gay district, The Castro. Gaymazing!!!
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Who doesn't love those wild and crazy 1920's superstars Stan Laurel & Oliver Hardy? Well now, 90 years later, Laurel & Hardy are back in the same pair of pants (yes, in the same pair of pants as eachother) ready to rock and roll around San Francisco, tipping their cap to the sites and sounds.
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Unfortunately, because Tom Cruise is such an incredibly VERSATILE actor (double entendre ALERT), we are stuck hearing about him and his ridiculous antics in the media all the time. While I wish most times he would just go away, I would permit him to stay in the public spotlight if (and only if) he would never stop dancing.
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In one of the most shockingly offensive/awesome headlines I have ever seen in my life, found (naturally) on FoxNews.com, two Mexican midget professional wrestlers who were also brothers were found dead in a low-end hotel apparently the victims of a drugging/theft/homicide at the hands of cholas posing as prostitutes.
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In what has to be the most horrifying lesson she has ever learned in her life, a Northern California HELLUVMENTARY school teacher accidently spliced in a 6-second clip of herself getting railed on a couch into a class-wide DVD full of videotaped stories that the children told for a school project. Oops...
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OK, straight up. I know this is more suited for LameHelluv.com, but FUCKIN A, I have some things to say about this fucking crackwhore turning tricks inside her van, sucking dick with her 5 year old in the backseat, and even snorting lines OFF OF HER BABY. Yes, that is right. Blowing Blow off of her BABY.
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If Switzerland and Lake Como, Italy comprised the Most Incredible Weekend of My Life, then my December 2003 trip to Rome would be the exact polar opposite of that weekend. Between getting separated from my stuff and getting my balls juggled on the Roman Subway and not seeing my friend Kathleen for her birthday (which is why I went), Rome RAPED me.
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Anyone growing up in the 1990's knows and loves Saved by the Bell like their own genitalia. Personally, I am eternally grateful to TBS for their daily reruns each and every morning to help me begrudgingly slither out of bed to get to work remotely in the vicinity of on-time....time...there is NO time, there is never ANY time!
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Right before I left for Amsterdam, I was almost killed by the inept retarded out of hand staff at Kaiser Permanente (which almost made me Permanente Dead) when my appendix exploded inside me and leaked gangrenous rotten former pieces of appendix around my insides while I slowly died. I I know I am supposed to turn a negative into a positive, so I hope someone laughs at my misfortunes.
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Thizz in Peace David Carradine (December 8, 1936 – June 3, 2009). Who'da thunk, you didn't need Pai Mei's Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique. You just needed some rope so Bill could whack off, use it to hang himself, and tie some around his junk as a cockring during accidental auto-erotic asphyxiation. That just makes him more of a badass, and more sorely missed....OK maybe sorely is the wrong word. He will be missed HELLUV.
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Jobless young San Franciscans are welcoming the worst recession of their lives with open arms. In one of the best examples of flippin a negativo into a positivo, the young workforce of San Francisco are turning unemployment into FUNemployment. Too bad the party can't last forever...
...or can it?
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So the Supreme Court refused to overturn the Prop 8 ruling in California, which is NOT TIGHT, however, political action IS tight, helluv, and all California residents need to get their asses out there and protest and show the Supreme Court that they made a big big mistake.
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